We've saved the best to last. Well, maybe not the 'best'. The most weird? Maybe. The most 'we threw the kitchen sink at it'? Could be. Read on:
"What the hell!"
That was the first thing I said when I first experienced the game. And then I thought - you guys have just GOT to see this one. I mean, just look at this screen below. There is so much going on. There is also digitized speech as well.
Strap in fellas, we're in for one crazy ride.
In their own words....
When humanity discovered fire what do you think was the first food they plunged into it? It was, of course, bread, the very staff of life, and so the best thing since before sliced bread - toast - was born.
Now in this new age of decadence things have moved on, but not by much. We need something on which to lay our smashed avocado. And so toast is once again king of the foodstuffs.
That, anyway, is the vision of The Hotel Excess, your two (and a half) star slice of paradise (geddit?) right here on Neasden High Road. Owners Sid and Doris Bonkers have invested a lot of money in an all new, (only five previous owners), Murky Riddards ToastOMatic machine. For some foolish reason you have applied for the job as operator, and for an even more foolish reason they have given you it.
So how hard could it be?
You turn up at 7am and your shift ends at 11am. In between customers come to the bar and ask for toast. It will be quiet when you start but gets busy quickly before a calmer period and then a small rush mid-morning. You can see the orders and all you have to do is select one by typing the letter corresponding to the type. The ToastOMatic will select a free slot for your order.
Toasting is a scientific task and the ToastOMatic lets you know how it's going: monitoring, in order, the temperature, the power in the slot and the moisture in the bread. Once the bread has dried it starts to toast and you need to pop it at the ideal moment (handily marked for you). Pop too soon and our customers will not be happy, too late and it starts to burn and you can set the smoke alarm off. Obviously, duh, ignoring customer orders is also not a good idea and orders might start to turn red if you do that.
Popping is easy though - just pick the slot and press the number.
There are different types of bread all with different moisture contents and thicknesses - but you know that anyway, because why else would you have applied for the job? Right?
You are paid on a piece rate - that's measured by the score. Sid and Doris are modern employers so they won't ask you to pay them if you go into negative territory, but you will be asked to leave. Get to be too good and you will also be asked to leave, but we call that winning. If you manage that, do let us know!
Money isn't everything of course. There is also your reputation. And even more importantly there is Sid and Doris's reputation and so Sid keeps a beady eye on your behaviour. If you make him angry by serving too much bad toast, or by failing to handle customer orders in a timely fashion, you will be asked to leave.
Sid is also one of those people for whom enough is never good enough, so every day you work for him he is likely to have higher and higher expectations. Good luck. We think you're going to need it.
Controls:
Letter keys add bread to the first available slot - use the capital letter in the order e.g. White = W, baGel = G, gluten Free = F.
Number keys 1-4 will pop toast out of that slot and serve to the first matching customer.
Back to my review.
So the idea is that customers come at you with a wide range of toast based orders, and you have to manage the queue and the toasters. One wrong move and it's toast for you! See what I did there? AC/MC are not the only ones who can make bad bread puns.
For a toast based simulator a lot of effort has gone into this. I wasn't kidding when I said they threw the kitchen sink at it. The game is full of weird and wonderful details. For example, a full screen of faces that appears when you start your shift - Why is it there? who knows! It's not a clunky feeling game either. It plays very well, and the controls are responsive, the animations are fluid and the action is fast paced. The sound effects keep up the tension and soon I was getting stressed, trying to guess what letter was needed to make each type of toast, trying to figure out when to pop the toast and how to manage the queue.
AC/MC give just enough instruction to play the game with out over explaining anything. This is a good move and kept me on my toes, even though I had made a note of the keys. I'm not going to tell you anymore about how to play - just give it a go. This is a good game disguised as a crap game.
Given that the universe is infinite, and in an infinite universe, there are infinite possibilities, would anyone like any toast?
GREAT effort from this coding duo - well done guys!
Come see
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